Common Characteristics of a Clutter Clearer
Self Esteem is defined as: How we value and perceive ourselves (mind.org.uk)
It relates to how we feel about ourselves and can be positively or negatively affected at any point in our lives. For example; if we’re bullied, constantly criticised, abused, lose a job, have relationship problems, have a mental or physical health condition, have financial problems, poor self-image.
It’s not a coincidence that Low Self Esteem has many of the same potential triggers as the trauma element of our Clutter cake. It may be one specific trigger, or a combination of several.
In relation to our Clutter, our self-esteem determines our ability to:
- Believe that we can clear our clutter
- Believe we deserve a Clutter Free Home and Life
- Be willing to start our Clutter Clearing Journey before we have 100% belief
- Make decisions confidently
- Focus on the positives more than the negatives
- Get through the bad days / tough weeks that we all have on our Journey
- Treat ourselves with kindness and compassion
- Learn from our (inevitable) mistakes and keep going
- Practice self-care through rewards
Low Self Esteem can sabotage your Clutter Clearing Success. It’s like a gremlin that’s constantly talking in your head and points out all your little faults and failures to put you off and make you give up (again).
Did You Know?
Low Self Esteem is both a symptom and a cause of perfectionism
When you struggle with low self-esteem, change is scary. It’s no coincidence that the majority of those of us who struggle with clutter have low self-esteem (and if you feel defensive about me saying that, and your reaction is to think ‘how dare you say that’ or ‘not me’, that may be a sign you have low self-esteem!).
5 Ways we deal with Low Self Esteem on our Clutter Clearing Journey
- We have rewards to acknowledge the positive progress we make towards our Clutter Free Goal
- We capture our successes and gratitudes daily in our Success / Gratitude Journal to recognise our small, large and significant achievements
- We break down our big Journey into 7 Steps
- If you’re a Group or Private Journey Member you have the support of me and others to help you focus on the positives and feel heard and understood
- We have our weekly and End of Term Goals to be a small, manageable, bitesize challenge to focus on.
10 SIGNS OF LOW SELF ESTEEM
|Sign||Clutter Clearing Example||Tick|
|I say negative things and I’m often critical about myself||I didn’t do ‘enough’ this week|
I ‘should’ be able to do this without help
|I joke about myself in a negative way||Clearly, I’m useless at making decisions||⬜|
|I focus on my negatives and ignore / dismiss my achievements||I didn’t finish my Clutter Clearing Session (even though I did do SOMETHING)||⬜|
|I blame myself when things go wrong||I should’a / could’a / would’a done x,y,z||⬜|
|I think other people are better than me and often compare myself to them||xxxxx is doing their Journey much faster than me – they’re clearly better than me||⬜|
|I don’t think I deserve to have fun||I don’t deserve a reward until I’ve cleared ALL my clutter||⬜|
|I struggle to accept compliments||I know I’ve cleared x rooms / areas, but look how much more there still is to clear||⬜|
|I often expect people to disapprove of or criticise what I do / how I do it||You’re probably going to tell me I’ve done this is wrong but….||⬜|
|I often feel sad, depressed, anxious, ashamed, angry or worthless||I can’t deal with my clutter right now / I’m just going to have to accept this life||⬜|
|I always feel I didn’t / haven’t done enough||I didn’t achieve my (unrealistic) goal or deadline||⬜|
TOTAL OUT OF 10 ⬜
If you’ve scored 3 or more out of 10 in the table above, come and join the Social Gatherings and get the support you need to believe that you can clear your clutter and you DESERVE to clear your clutter: https://www.clutterclearing.net/social-gathering/