Common Characteristics of a Clutter Clearer – Stuck in a Cycle of Self Sabotage


It’s common for people on their Journey to clear areas and rooms in their home and then find themselves stuck in a cycle of self-sabotage that means they get stuck on their Journey.

It’s rarely done consciously. We’ve been so used to failing in the past that it’s become a subconscious automatic habit, which is the result of self-sabotage. Here are 5 common reasons why we self-sabotage:

1. Insecure Attachment

This is when we have a lack of trust in our relationships based on our experiences, so we form a strong attachment to our clutter because it makes us feel safe. It’s a form of self-protection, our way of trying to ‘future proof’ our lives, which is why people who struggle with clutter usually have insecure attachment and a fear about not having things in the future. It is evident in our anxiety about letting go of things in our clutter.

2. Fear

If we successfully clear our clutter, that may trigger fear. Fear of success; losing our identify (see no.5); relationships changing for the worse; of new pressures, expectations and anxiety about having to maintain a clutter free home and live our Best Life.

3. Uncomfortable Emotions

As you get close to succeeding, it can trigger uncomfortable emotions because your previous experiences of failure and your old belief that you can’t succeed are being challenged. So, even though you are succeeding, you self-sabotage to confirm your long held belief that you’ll never actually clear it.

4. Cognitive Dissonance

This is where we have two conflicting ideas at the same time, and it can be uncomfortable. The most common example of it in relation to our Clutter Clearing is when we say we want to clear our clutter Forever. When we then reach a point where we’re actually succeeding, because we’ve never managed to clear it or stay clutter free in the past, we don’t believe that we can this time, yet we continue to be on our Journey and start to self-sabotage. Deep down you don’t believe you can successfully complete your Journey and stay clutter free Forever, or that you are worthy of success, so you consciously or subconsciously self-sabotage.

5. Your Identity

Your clutter is part of your identify. There are two reasons why that this can lead to self-sabotage. First, you’ve been labelled as ‘The Cluttered One’ in your family or social group. Family members have accepted that you will always be cluttered. If you successfully clear your clutter, your identity within your family or social group will change. But if you’re not ‘The Cluttered One’ – who will you be? It might de-stable your relationships because you’re changing your identity, which makes other people uncomfortable, so best to keep others comfortable by failing – again. Second, if your family or social group also struggle with clutter and you successfully clear it, you might lose those friendships, relationships and connections. They might get angry that you’ve done what they are still failing to do. You’ll have proved the impossible is possible.

You can clear your clutter fast, or you can clear your clutter forever, but you can’t clear your clutter forever, fast.

To find out how Clare can help you clear your clutter Forever, without the need for an expensive home visit, click here now:

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