2023 – Your Year
Before I started Clearing my Clutter, I was seeing a therapist regularly.
I knew I had more challenges than just my clutter, and with hindsight I was hoping she’d tell me how to deal with them all without actually having to spend any time, energy, effort or money on dealing with them.
Then one week I had a lightbulb learning moment when she told me the secret to changing your life.
Turns out there are no magic wands that you can buy to do it all for you in the blink of an eye.
She told me the most important thing you have to do is to shift from living in ‘Effect’ mode and start living in ‘Cause’ mode.
She said that if I wanted any chance of succeeding, I had to decide whether I wanted to continue living my life in ‘Effect’ mode, or whether I was willing to step outside my comfort zone and start living in ‘Cause’ mode.
What’s the difference?
People living in ‘Effect’ mode live their life reacting to the ‘Effects’ of external events that they can’t control or even influence. As a result, they’re unhappy, unfulfilled, using the ‘Effects’ of external events as the reason they’re not happy or able to live a fulfilling life or their best life. They use external events to explain their current situation, believe all the media headlines apply to them, and believe they’re not responsible for their current situation.
They’ll allow themselves to get drawn into other people’s dramas and often create their own personal drama to avoid having to deal with their issues.
They’ll blame their current situation on things that are outside their control such as the past, the future, the pandemic, their parents, siblings, other people, their health, the Government, the Economy, their age, etc. The list of people and things they ‘blame’ for their current circumstances is endless.
You can tell someone is living in ‘Effect’ mode when they respond to an offer of help with ‘yes, but….’
They can spend hours talking about why their clutter isn’t their fault. They’ll tell themselves they haven’t got time, they can’t afford help, yet they don’t know how much they spend on a monthly basis, and they don’t budget. They impulse buy to make themselves feel better, justifying it by saying they ‘deserve’ it. They believe the media when they say no-one has any money.
People who live in the ‘Effect’ mode refuse to take responsibility for their situation, and they make themselves powerless to do anything to change their situation because they believe it’s outside their control. They wait for things to change, which is as futile as waiting for the magic wand that’s going to deal with your clutter for you to be discovered.
Successful Clutter Clearers on the other hand, live in ‘Cause’ mode. They’ll say ‘I’m not sure, but I’m willing to try’.
Living in ‘Cause’ mode is about taking responsibility for your life and dealing with the causes of your current situation. You focus on what you can control. You take responsibility and find solutions. You’re not afraid to risk making mistakes because you know that’s all part of learning and changing. You’re not looking for anyone to blame. You’re focused on living your best life.
When you live in ‘Cause’ mode you believe that finding a solution to your current situation is within your control, even if you’re not responsible for your current situation and don’t yet have a solution.
When you live in ‘’Cause’ mode you know the solution is within your control, you focus on the future, accept help, and you take appropriate action.
The uncomfortable truth is, a lot of people who have had their clutter for any length of time are stuck in ‘Effect’ mode, and nothing will convince them to even try ‘Cause’ mode for any meaningful amount of time.
When I started Clutter Clearing I came across a LOT of ‘Effect’ people, and it’s why I stopped offering free telephone calls to people who hadn’t yet proved to me they were committed to clearing their clutter. They only wanted to talk about their clutter. There was always a good reason why the help I provided didn’t apply to them (so why where they calling me? Ah yes, to talk about how awful their life is and that it’s not their fault).
Lots of ‘Effect’ mode people have joined Social Gatherings but not started their Journey – ‘Cause’ mode – because ‘Effect’ mode is their comfort zone that they’re not ready to step outside yet. Sometimes they never do. The fear of change is simply too great.
Switch to ‘Cause’ mode in 2023
To succeed with your Clutter Clearing you need to be in ‘Cause’ mode, so if you think you’re too overwhelmed to start your Clutter Clearing Journey, get the Overwhelm workshop, join the Social Gatherings or start your Group Journey to get the support you need to get started and get through the bad days and tough weeks.
If you think you haven’t got enough time to start your 7 Step Journey, plan your time and protect your time. I guarantee you’re spending a lot more time than you think doing things that don’t add any value to your life.
If you’re ready to switch to ‘Cause Mode’ and you want to know how Clare can help you do that, visit her free online help centre now: https://www.clutterclearing.net/clares-help-centre/